Dating online guides: When you’ve formed a connection with someone online and you’re preparing for the all-important first date offline, the key is to keep it simple. Meet for a coffee or a walk in the park so that you have a chance to really talk and get to know one another. This way you can establish if there’s chemistry between you – if you feel like you’ve clicked online, then most likely you’ll click in person too! Salama Marine advises: ‘Focus on the future, not the past: no one likes to hear about an ex on a first date, right?’ Try not to compare your date to previous partners and allow yourself to be open to something and someone new. One of the best online dating tips then is to keep the past in the past.

Three-quarters of the profile should be about me, and the other quarter about what I want in a mate, says Hoffman, who tells me to be specific here, too: The goal isn’t to attract everyone, it’s to find The One. We come up with “My ideal match is someone who loves family, has an opinion on current events, and can hold his own at a cocktail party on a Friday night, then chill with me on a lazy Saturday.” The final touch is a headline that sums up my approach to life, like a personal slogan. Hoffman suggests “Family. Kindness. Friends. Faith. That’s what I value most.” Hmm. I’m spiritual and go to church, but “faith” sounds heavy. I swap it for “fun.”

Ignore most of the person’s explicit claims about his or her personality — for example, “I have a sense of humor about myself” or “I’m an optimist.” People are very unreliable self-reporters. People are very unreliable self-reporters. That’s not just because they lie (although that’s a possibility, too), but because the way we see ourselves often bears little relation to how others see us. And only external events provoke our negative reactions, right? (We humans are expert self-justifiers.) It means nothing. The only explicit claims worth taking at face value are factual — job, age, education and location. When it comes to less tangible qualities, people are just too biased.

It’s easy to lose faith when your first few dates don’t work out. It’s very unusual for someone to find a good match in their first few attempts. See it all as experience, not as proof that you’re a loser (or that everyone else is a loser). Learn from your bad and boring dates and try again. You’re two grown-ups, not a sugardaddy and his gold-digger. Chivalry means being attentive, thoughtful and fair, not paying for all the food. See more info about online dating right here.

“I think that there’s this idea that you must have a witty, thoughtful, and overall brilliant opener when you’re messaging someone first on a dating app. That’s just not true. Sure, it could be cute if you managed to find a funny way to illustrate you read their profile and share a common interest, but if you can’t do that, don’t stress. It doesn’t matter what you open with as long as you open. ‘Hey, any exciting plans this weekend?’ is something you can say to anyone. Really, it’s as simple as that.” —Zachary Zane, bisexual activist and writer.